John Otteni

Every Beach Boys Album Ranked

Today is the last day of Summer! So in honor (or memoriam) I give you my official Beach Boys Album Ranking. But first! A quick word from yours truly…

One of my favorite musical projects over the past two years has been diving deep into band discographies. Have I spent hours listening to albums better left forgotten? Absolutely. Is there anything to learn from enduring Van Halen III? You’d be surprised.

If it’s a band you love, experiencing their highs—and their lows—brings you closer to them. You note how they respond, album by album, to success and failure. You see them retool or double down on their sound. You feel the impact of lineup changes, shifts in creative direction, and evolving instrumentation and production. It’s more than just hearing a band evolve; it’s hearing the music industry evolve.

So how had I not listened to all of The Beach Boys until this past summer? They’re one of my all-time favorite bands. Hell, I once fought through a sea of drunk boomers at a winery just to see Brian Wilson reunite with the band.

For one, the band has 29 albums. And (spoiler alert) they peaked early. Sure, there were solid albums in the early ’70s and a good song or two later on, but the Beach Boys never had that great “comeback” album. No great albums post-1971 at least in my opinion. Still, there’s a lot to appreciate in their 50+ year journey.

Where do we begin? How about a tier list? Remember when those were popular for a hot minute? Plus, if you don’t feel like reading the whole thing, you can just glance at the pic below and peace out.

Note: I did not include the 2011 SMiLE Sessions release as it’s not an official Beach Boys album. It’s good though!

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Criterion Month Day 29: All of Us Strangers

All of Us Strangers (2023)

“You simply can’t go home again” is a quote from Thomas Wolfe’s 1940 novel of the same name that is just as poignant now as when it was written. I was reminded of this quote by a 1963 interview Rod Serling did with Binny Lum for Australian Radio.

In the interview, Serling discusses how The Twilight Zone can use imaginative storytelling to explore the idea of going back to another time, but how returning always brings with it a great sense of loss. I can think of no better word to describe Andrew Haigh’s All of Us Strangers than “loss.”

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Criterion Month Day 25: Clouds of Sils Maria

Clouds of Sils Maria (2014)

If there was ever a film that felt genetically engineered to play exclusively at European film festivals, it’s Olivier Assayas’ Clouds of Sils Maria. Like, I’m passionate about complex characters in fiction, but not like Juliette Binoche’s Maria. That’s the distance I feel with Maria, an acclaimed film and stage actress, grappling with the defining work of her career and how it relates to her age. I’m not an actor, but I can never imagine becoming so entwined with my art that it feels like torture. That must be why they call them “tortured artists.”

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Criterion Month Day 24: Take Out

Take Out (2004)

I used to love Mumblecore films. The idea that you could take a few friends and film an improvised drama or comedy on consumer-grade cameras was inspiring to my younger self. Sean Baker is not part of the mumblecore movement, but he taps into the same part of my brain that loves mumblecore. Baker’s films have the same lo-fi, improvised feel as a mumblecore film. He also uses numerous non-professional actors, often in major roles, but there’s a key difference that not only separates Baker from that movement but also elevates his work above most of those films.

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Criterion Month Day 22: Ratcatcher

Ratcatcher (1999)

Lynne Ramsay’s coming-of-age drama Ratcatcher is the kind of film I hate writing about. Don’t get me wrong—it’s artful and subtle in a way that can only be truly communicated through film. The problem—excuse me, my problem—is that I like to believe a good review provides both questions and answers. Ratcatcher is a film where there are no easy answers, and I’m not even sure what questions I should be asking.

What I mean is that it’s hard for me to tell, scene by scene, what decisions are deliberate and what decisions exist to show the randomness of childhood. Film logic dictates that every scene moves the narrative forward, but here, I just don’t know how. Let’s see if we can find out.

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Criterion Month Day 19: Mystery Train

Mystery Train (1989)

I love anthologies! Why don’t they make more anthologies? Yorgos Lanthimos made Kinds of Kindness this year—did I see it? Oops, I’m part of the problem! But I look forward to seeing it because anthologies are perfect for short attention spans (like mine). Don’t like the story? Just wait for the next one. If you want to argue that anthologies are annoying because the movie keeps having to stop and restart, let me try to convince you to reconsider with this review of Jim Jarmusch’s Mystery Train.

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Criterion Month Day 14: Streetwise

Streetwise (1984)

The first time I read about Martin Bell’s 1984 film Streetwise was in the December 2009 issue of Seattle Metropolitan Magazine. The issue was dedicated to “75 Years of Seattle Movies,” and no film in that issue piqued my interest like Streetwisee. A gritty documentary about teens living on the streets of my city? But Seattle’s not a dangerous, hardened, urban jungle like New York, right? Right?!?

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